Interview With Pleasure Expert On Ways To Unleash Your SensualityLast updated September 12, 2018
After a Sensual Sunday at Lady Liquid Love, we excitedly caught up with host and pleasure expert, Jessica on ways to unleash your sensuality.
Tell us a bit about yourself, your partner, and your events.
My background is in event management, somatic sex education and massage – a full range of bodywork modalities from remedial, pregnancy massage to sensual erotic massage.
My partner D is a well accomplished music performer and originally from East Africa where he was taught ancient sexual practices handed down through generations in particular how to practically support women in the art of female ejaculation.
When we met we discovered our shared passion for learning about how sensual pleasure and being relaxed, listening and enjoying our own bodies can have a profound impact on how we understand ourselves at a deeper level.
Together we combined my Western training with his East African practices to adapt and give a unique fusion of sensual, erotic experiences and tuition that we offer as ‘Ebony & Ivory sensual massage’.
Many of our private clients felt comfortable with us and wanted us to facilitate small gatherings with their other open minded lovers/friends/play partners. Here the concept of our guided intimate play parties developed to what has become Pleasure Island Parties. They happen every 2 months in London and have also occurred in Spain, France, Switzerland, US, Hungary, Rwanda. We’ve just got back from hosting our first party in Japan!
There are four main branches to my work:
Pleasure Island Parties – guided, intimate pleasure parties for people seeking to explore their sensuality in safe beautiful environments.
Sexological bodywork – “Sexological Bodyworkers are somatic sex educators, supporting individuals, couples and groups to learn to direct their own erotic development, learn about their bodies, sex and sexuality, or work through sexual issues or concerns.”
Lady Liquid Love – a sensual experiential event for women of all flavours to explore their bodies. Liquid Love is a collective journey exploring playfulness and the sensuality of flowing skin to skin contact using warm olive oil….Lady Liquid Love is for women, female bodied or identified people (women of all flavours, trans and cis women).
Ebony and Ivory sensual massage – myself and my long term male partner provide 4 hand sensual massage for individuals and couples/friends and also teach people how to give a sensual massage.
How do you think sensuality and touch can improve relationships and self-love?
To me sensuality and touch are vital ingredients for a happy and healthy life, when we can slow down and ‘feel’ what we’re feeling rather than ‘thinking’ what we’re feeling it can give us a greater capacity to understand ourselves at a deeper level.
When we can understand our bodies at a deeper level this can make our own communication with ourselves and others easier. Self-love can grow when we understand our own patterns, distractions, needs, desires and can help us explore our own boundaries and responses to sensuality and touch.
Coming from a tangible reference point of experiencing touch and sensation within our own bodies can help us articulate (verbally and non verbally) what works for us and be open to hearing, learning and safely exploring what works for others.
How does Pleasure Island differ from other play parties?
The main difference is that they are guided at the beginning. This helps takes the pressure people put on themselves to perform and helps to calm and slow down allowing guests to really listen to what pleasures they may be seeking and flow within their own boundaries.
My partner and I host the event in a very personal manner – we make sure we’ve talked to everyone as they register for a party, we then make sure on the night that everyone is comfortable and we’re totally there to help people relax and navigate their way if they need help to connect with guests or want a bit of guidance with massage and touch or to learn a trick or two!
Approximately 20 – 30 people attend so they’re smaller than most. We sell tickets in pairs so everyone has to bring a partner. This helps creates a nice and friendly vibe so everyone knows someone, our dress code is ‘sensual attire’ meaning people remove their shoes on arrival and get down to whatever makes them feel good – robes, lingerie, boxers.
People arrive strictly within a 30min timeframe to ensure I welcome everyone together to go over guidelines of the venue and to ensure a safe, consensual, hygienic play space. I then guide everyone through a couple of gentle easy going touch activities to help people get into their bodies, meet others in a non-verbal way and to relax and go with the flow.
The emphasis on creating a sensual atmosphere with touch and massage at the beginning of the party is our way to set the nice relaxed tone for the rest of the night. No pressure to have sex, no long waiting times till people get drunk (we don’t provide alcohol) or [waiting till] the last hour of the party before anything happens!
How do you ensure a comfortable, safe and hygienic atmosphere?
Safe and consensual sex is the only type of sex that happens at Pleasure Island, we make sure we provide all safe sex materials and ensure people use them and there’s always a shower and sanitising products available.
We ensure people understand and agree to all our sexual health and safety guidelines when we have a chat with them as they register and encourage all attendees to get regular sexual health checks.
Lady Liquid love is a space where no penetration or genital touch is allowed however as a clothing optional event with a lot of opportunity for direct full body skin to skin contact there are risks that we ensure people understand.
For both Lady Liquid Love and Pleasure Island Party events we state that: If you have any contagious and/or active infectious such as: Fever, flu, active outbreak of herpes or any other STIs you’ll unfortunately not be able to attend for the safety of the group.
If at the beginning of Lady Liquid Love you have any rash, open wound, scab, cut or other skin condition that might enhance or facilitate the transmission of disease you are asked not to participate and could be asked to leave.
How would you explain the atmosphere of one of your events?
The beautiful sensual atmosphere is felt as soon as you enter – alluring lighting, lovely aroma, friendly open minded people with an enhancing sexy playlist!
Pleasure Island Parties have the same format and timings and usually one party is on a Friday night and another on the Saturday night.
Some people (especially newbies) choose to attend both nights – first night to see how they go and usually the following night they don’t have as many nerves or anticipation about what to expect and they can go with the flow and explore their own pleasure easier.
Usually there’s a mix of people from all different backgrounds scenes or no particular scene at all, a third of guests would be new to any sort of play party, a third having some experience and a third being very experienced – this helps create a really nice atmosphere that supports and encourages people to explore.
Each night can be different depending on the vibes people bring and the chemistry that occurs between the guests throughout the party – usually waves of pleasure play, blissed out bodies and loads of beautiful sensual scenes!
Do you have any advice for someone wanting to attend one of your sessions?
If anyone has any particular issues or are just nervous then as a host it can help if I’m aware of them prior to the event – this is usually discussed as people register. Totally normal to feel nervous trying something new!
How should people get in touch with you to unleash their sensuality?
WhatsApp/Text on 07708835756 is usually best – ideally people should state what event or session they’d like to explore and we can take it from there.
All links with more info to all the sites are here:
- Pleasure Island Parties www.pleasureislandparties.com
- Sexological Bodywork www.jessicaparker.co
- Lady Liquid Love www.ladyliquidlove.com
- Ebony and Ivory www.ebonyandivory.website